i wanna squish ur cheeks
My art is under the tag 'sometimes chickens art'. I'm Pro-ta-go-nist on Deviantart and EggnogDrunkard on fanfiction.net.

It is an age-old secret that people make better decisions between 1 and 2 cups of wine- being a little inebriated makes you feel like anything is possible, and I have witnessed many historical events, gently swaying from side to side. In other words, this is an art/drabble dump blog, products of my fuzzy mind. Slightly worrying, to be honest.

I'm an
INFP. Which of course, stands for Infinitely Neurotic Flying Panda. Because when chickens are drunk, they are pandas which can fly.

unshaped:

"just stop thinking about it"

omg ok thank you so much for your advice why didn’t I just come up WITH THIS PERFECT IDEA LET ME JUST STOP THINKING ABOUT THE THING THAT BUGS ME THE MOST IN MY LIFE OMG THAT IS SO EASY THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH FOR MAKING MY LIFE BETTER I WOULD HAVE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT THIS BY MYSELF

dickw0lves:

creepitrevl:

communismkills:

P.S. The real world isn’t going to accommodate you and your “comfort.” When you get off Tumblr, there aren’t any trigger warnings. Wearing a nametag with your “gender identity” on it would be absolutely laughable. You’ll have to learn to be an adult and deal with people without being psychotic and wishing death on them.

Rebloging twice because people should have to read this more than once

SOMEONE SAID IT

How to escape after being buried alive in a coffin.

suzannqueenofhell:

awkward-fallen-demon-in-221b:

freakology101:

timesnewromney:

shickhard:

It could happen to anyone. People bury a person alive to scare them or to get rid of them. In this situation, rely only on yourself.

  1. Do not waste oxygen. In a classic coffin there’s only enough oxygen for about an hour, maybe two. Inhale deeply, exhale very slowly. Once inhaled - do not swallow, or you will start to hyperventilate. Do not light up lighters or matches, they will waste oxygen. Using a flashlight is allowed. Screaming increases anxiety, which causes increased heartbeat and therefore - waste of oxygen. So don’t scream.
  2. Shake up the lid with your hands. In some cheap low-quality coffins you will be able to even make a hole (with an engagement ring or a belt buckle.)
  3. Cross your arms over your chest, holding onto your shoulders with your hands, and pull the shirt off upward. Tie it in a knot above your head, like so: imageThis will prevent you from suffocating when the dirt falls on your face. 
  4. Kick the lid with your legs. In some cheap coffins the lid is broken or damaged already after being buried, due to the weight of the ground above it. 
  5. As soon as the lid breaks, throw and move the dirt that falls through in the direction of your feet. When it takes up a lot of space, try pressing the ground to the sides of the coffin with your legs and feet. Move around a bit. 
  6. Whatever you do - your main goal is to sit up: dirt will fill up the empty space and move to your advantage, so no matter what - do not stop and try breathing steadily and calmly. 
  7. Get up. Remember: the dirt in the grave is very loose, so battling your way up will be easier than it seems. It’s the other way around during a rainy weather however, since water makes dirt heavy and sticky. 

JUST TO PROVE TUMBLR HAS A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR FUCKING EVERYTHING.

just in case guys

Is this how Dean Winchester escaped his coffin guys?

yes, exactly.

descentintotyranny:

Israel begins its ground invasion of the Gaza Strip

thingsamylikes:

browneyedtrickster:

Favourite Audrey Ramirez Quotes

Audrey doesn’t get NEARLY enough love. It’s Edwardian period, yet she’s a genius Hispanic engineer who wears overalls, has adorably little meaty arms, doesn’t take any crap from boys, runs a mechanic business with her father and her sister is a prize fighter.
Cool Disney female characters don’t have to be princesses, folks.

venesca:

matt112830:

sharplydressedtentacles:

banesidhe:

calming-tea:

samrgarrett:

outofthecavern:

opiatevampire:

theworldisconfused:

In addition to essentially inventing the computer, Alan Turing also broke the German Enigma Code during World War II which paved the way for the D-Day invasion. The man was a hyper-genius. I’ve read descriptions of his work by mathematical physicist Sir Roger Penrose. He’s been a hero of mine ever since.

The level of thought required to come up with the stuff he came up with is totally beyond my comprehension. I actually did not even know about his orientation until much later. He was prosecuted and ordered to undergo chemical castration. Soon thereafter, he committed suicide by eating a cyanide-laced apple.

The government forced him to take estrogen as a punishment (or “cure”?). He began to develop breasts and other side effects.

He committed suicide by biting into a cyanide laced apple. This is supposedly the inspiration for the name/logo of Apple computers.

omfg

omfg

and old Apple computers

the apple was a rainbow 

image

image

image

Reblogging again because more people need to know about Turing dammit.

Whoa…

Can you damn well imagine the talented LGBTQ+ people whose potentials are left to die because of the discrimination?

thehomosexuals:

Okay but Never Gonna Give You Up (better known as Rickroll) is actually a really really horrible song for many reasons, which I will better explain under the cut. 

Brace yourselves, this is pretty long.

Read More →

gayyoutubes:

doctorsherlocklokison:

futile-space:

a presentation by futile-space and alexemrulz

enjoy

Actually glasses are symmetrical and humans are drawn to symmetrical things and that’s why certain shapes or types of plants, etc, are more attractive to the human eye. Glasses, especially sunglasses, even out the face and make it appear more symmetrical.

And that is science friends

c-cassandra:

i think we all know this one person…

jhameia:

playwright-cute:

comeoutofthewoodwork:

fattyforever:

I remember how much her realization that she was “never going to be good enough for him” resonated with me when I first watched this movie. She decided to push herself, not to be with him, but to prove him the fuck wrong.

Strong female role models who can still wear pink and love fashion. Yes yes yes.

I FUCKING LOVE THIS MOVIE OH MY GODDDDDDDDDD

CAN WE JUST STOP FOR A SEC THO?

HE’S INSULTING HER FOR BEING DUMB

SHE GOT INTO THAT SCHOOL ON HER OWN.

WARNER NEEDED HIS DADDY TO CALL THEM TO BE ABLE TO GET IN.

I LOVE THIS MOVIE NO ONE EVEN UNDERSTANDS.

AND he was WAITLISTED.